So, I doubt I'm the only person who ever thought, "why do they call it a phillip's head screwdriver? is Phillip some guy with a weird shaped head or something." ("they" is everyone in the world....except babies. Babies don't call anything by name....idiots.) My next immediate thought was, "Wow Dan, are you serious? you don't really think that, do you? I mean, a guy with a weird shaped head? That's so stupid."
I realized that I don't and that if I did, I would most likely be half-retarded and probably live somewhere in Georgia.
But I still didn't know why they call it a Phillip's head screwdriver ("they." Still everyone but babies). So I did some research. Turns out, what really happened was that in 1698 some idiot named Phillip wanted to hang his favorite watercolor painting of Tupac Shakur and Dr. Dre, his favorite rappers of the era, in his den but he didn't have a screwdriver (back then, there was only one type of screwdriver, that is why I am not more specific in screwdriver style). The next day, like any member of a generous community, Phillip went next door and asked his neighbor to borrow his screwdriver and his neighbor accidentally gave him the prototype of a new "2 Way Flathead Screwdriver" that he was working on. So Phillip used the screwdriver on a 2 way flathead screw and it worked wonders. With basically no effort or wrist fatigue involved, Phillip was finally looking above his flat-screen, plasma TV set at his 2 favorite rappers. The very next day Phillip went down to the patent office and patented it as a screwdriver that provides better leverage and turnability than your standard flathead screwdriver. It could also be used as a multi-purpose weapon used to beat/stab your wife or spawn, but Phillip decided to leave that part out of the patent. He took all of the credit and named the screwdriver after himself.
Phillip never returned the original prototype. Phillip was an asshole.
Question (too lazy to make up another story): Why in the Hell Are There 2 Different Types Of Screw Heads?
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3 comments:
i was so excited when i read the title, then became not so excited when i discovered it was really about the tool. ahem.
sorry. what were you thinking it would be?
i have seen some of your episodes and read quite a few of your posts. so i am thinking you have a pretty good grip on the whole humor thing.
however, before i commit to my answer, i need to really contemplate the gravity of my situation. should i be a good southern girl or a well not good southern girl?
"Perhaps play a little game called "just the tip". Just for a second, just to see how it feels."
sorry if this comment does not answer your question. if it does than yay.
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